صحنهای کلیشهای در فیلمهای مختلف وجود دارد به این ترتیب که شخصی اسلحه بهدست میخواهد به مغلوب خلعسلاحشدهاش شلیک کند، اما درنگی میکند تا فرآیند کشتن قربانی خود را بیشتر طول بدهد و عجز و لابه او را در مقابل خودش ببیند. یا مثل سریالهای سیروس مقدم برخی کینههای قدیمی را باز کند و دلایل کشتن قربانیاش را موبهمو با جزئیات تقریبا کنکوری به او یادآوری کند. اما کلیشه اصلی اینجا اتفاق میافتد، مغلوب از اینهمه زخم زبان و تهدید به مرگ به ستوه میآید و فریاد میزند: «یالا شلیک کن لعنتی! دیگه نمیخوام چیزی بشنوم! آزارم نده، فقط شلیک کن!» نکته طنز ماجرا اینجاست که وقتی فضای التماس برای زندگی از بین رفته و قربانی سرفراز به اصرار طلب مرگ میکند دیگر تهدید به شلیک کارساز نیست و فرد پیروز هم حس سیطره خود را از دست میدهد و اسلحه را آرامآرام پایین میآورد.
دیروز فیلم وسترنی میدیدم که در آن سناریوی بالا موبهمو در حال اجراشدن بود. لحظهی آخر که فریادهای «اون ماشه لعنتی رو بکش و خلاصم کن» را شنیدم یک ثانیه طول نکشید که شخصیت کلاسیک کلاهدار و رولور بهدست ماجرا ماشه را کشید و چهرهی مبهوت از مرگ قربانی نگاه آخرش را به زندگی کرد و در دم جان داد. جدای از تم طنز ماجرا پیش خودم گفتم که: پس اگر از کلیشهها بگذریم و واقعیت را در نظر بگیریم نباید انتظار داشت که بیاییم خیلی مغرور و پرافتخار در مقابل مرگ سینه سپر کنیم، بعد همه چیز سینمایی پیش برود و ما هم جان سالم به در ببریم. اگر از مرگ بترسیم و التماس کنیم دو حالت وجود دارد: یا مرگ ما را در حالت التماس میکشد یا به خاطر التماسهایمان رهایمان میکند. اگر هم سرافراز و مغرور نگاهی تحقیرآمیز نثارش کنیم دوباره همان دو حالت پیش آمد نیست: یا اسلحه را پایین میآورد یا در آنی ماشه را میچکاند. سوال اینجاست: ترسیدن یا نترسیدن از مرگ چه پیامد معقول، عینی و مشاهدهپذیری دارد؟ البته به جز تفاوت واضحی که در نحوه زندگی ما دارند: ترس زندگی را جهنم میکند.
یک جور دیگر سوالم را مطرح کنم: ترس همیشه متعلق به موجودی زنده است، مادامیکه ترس هست مرگی در کار نیست و در لحظهای که مرگ بیاید دیگر ترسی حداقل به معنای ارگانیسمی آن وجود نخواهد داشت. چه چیز باعث میشود دو پدیده ذاتا متباین از نظر رخداد زمانی، عمیقا در ذهن ما به همدیگر مربوط بشوند؟
به بهانه زلزلههای اخیر سعی کردم معنای ترس از مرگ را برای خودم فهمیدنیتر کنم. اصولا وقتی درباره ترس از یک چیز حرف میزنیم از ترس مواجهه با آن چیز سخن میگوییم. مثلا مواجهه با یک حیوان درنده را ترسناک میدانیم چون باعث ایجاد پاسخ فیزیولوژیک هیجان و فرار و در نهایت بروز دردهای جسمی میشود. یا از اینکه جواب آزمایشمان در مورد یک بیماری جدی مثبت شود هراس داریم، زیرا میترسیم مجبور شویم سالها درد مربوط به آن را تحمل کنیم. اینجا ترس به معنای مواجهه با دردهای جسمی و اجبار به تحمل آنهاست. دردهایی که ممکن است ما را از پا در بیاورند. یا مثلا از موقعیتهای اجتماعی و اضطرابآوری چون سخنرانی یا امتحان واهمه داریم چون چالشهایی سخت برایمان به وجود میآورند که مجبوریم در مقابل انسانهای دیگر از عهده آنها برآییم و اگر موفق نشویم از خراب شدن تصویرمان در ذهن دیگران ناراحت و شرمنده خواهیم شد.
در همهی موقعیتهای هراسآور مشابه هم سناریو خیلی پیچیدهتر نیست. تقریبا به همان دلیل که علاقهای به رنج کشیدن نداریم از فرآیندهایی که به رنج منتهی میشوند هم دوری میکنیم. وقتی این دوری کردن به اشتغالی ذهنی تبدیل شود و بتوانیم در صورت عدم حضور واقعی محرکها و موقعیتهای عذابآور در ذهنمان آنها را شبیهسازی کرده و در مورد راههای دوری از آنها برنامهریزی کنیم ترس به شکلی خیلی جدی متولد میشود.
مهمترین دلیل برای توجیه اینکه انسان عصر جدید از منظر فیزیولوژيکی استعداد بیشتری برای ترس و اضطراب در خود مییابد را نیز باید در توان ذهنی او جستوجو کرد. به لطف تحول فیزیولوژیکی و البته تنوع گسترده دانش و هنر بعنوان خوراکهای ذهنی، انسان کنونی با فرآیند تخیل بسیار آشناتر از قبل شدهاست. و میتواند انواع و اقسام موقعیتها را در ذهنش بیافریند، در رویاها و کابوسهایش زندگی کند و در واقعیت امور تحریف ایجاد کند. خب از آنجایی که ترس منشاء کاملا ذهنی دارد این ذهنیگرایی راه را برای بیشتر ترسیدن او از همه چیزهای ترسناک باز میکند.
یکی از این چیزهای ترسناک برای انسان مرگ است. به گفتهی هایدگر انسان هستندهای رو به مرگ است که هستی اش تنها در مرگ به خودینهترین شکل خودش درمیآید و انسان در مرگ است که واقعا آنی میشود که هست. هرچند آنجا دیگر انسانی درکار نیست که خود کامل شدهاش را زندگی کند. پس یک تفاوت مهم مرگ با چیزهای ترسناک دیگر در جهان این است که مرگ از جنس مواجهه نیست بلکه از جنس شدن است. ما در مردن با مرگمان مواجه نمیشویم، بلکه اساسا به ناحیه دیگری از هستی میرویم و به چیزی دیگر تبدیل میشویم. ترس از مرگ را نیز نمیتوان صرفا به یک ترس از مواجهه تقلیل کرد.
مرگ تمامکنندهی زمان شخصی هر انسانی است. درهم پیچاننده طومار بلند زندگی با همه فراز و نشیبهایش و نقطهی پایان ساعت شنی هر موجودی که زیسته است. پس اگر میخواهیم مرگ و قرابتش با ترس را بهتر بفهمیم باید به دنبال حلقه مفقوده بین اینها بگردیم: زمان.
مفهوم زمان زندگی را به سه ناحیه تقسیم میکند: گذشته، حال و آینده. این تثلیث مقدس را میتوان به عاریت گرفت و ترس از مرگ را نیز به سه احساس مجزا تقسیم کرد: ترس از زندگی (گذشته)، ترس از مردن (حال) و ترس از دنیای بعد از مرگ (آینده).
ترس از زندگی گذشته در واقع یک رنج روحیست و برای کسانی پیش میآید که بد زیستهاند و از آثار و کنشهایی که در طول زندگی خود بر جهان داشتهاند احساس رضایت نمیکنند. یا شاید میخواستهاند کار بزرگی را انجام دهند که هیچگاه موفق به انجامش نشدهاند، یا آرزویی در سر داشتهاند و هیچگاه مجال تحقق آن را پیدا نکردهاند. این نگاه به عقب در لحظهی مردن رنج روحی دردناکیست که شاید هیچ علاجی هم برای آن نباشد. بهجز اینکه هنوز که نمردهایم طوری تا آخرین لحظه خود را زندگی کنیم که بین ذهن و کنشمان هماهنگی کامل ایجاد کنیم و به دنبال آرزوهای بزرگمان برویم. شاید وقتش رسیده باشد از تخیلمان که رنجهای زیادی همچون ترس را برایمان به وجود آورده کمال استفاده را بکنیم. همین حالا چشمانمان را ببندیم و به لحظهی مرگمان فکر کنیم. چه کار ناکردهای داریم؟ چه چیزی از زندگی به چشممان میآید؟ هوس چه تجربهای در سر داریم؟ تا ساعت روی دیوار صدا میکند سراغشان را بگیریم.
ترس از لحظهی مردن از نوع ترسهای کلاسیک ماست. ترس از مواجهه. و اینجا مواجهه با سنگینی لحظهی مرگ. یک رنج واقعی، ملموس و طاقتفرسا. چیزی که میکشد. اصلا فرض کنید شدیدترین باری باشد که بتوان روی دوش یک انسان قرار داد. اما اگر بترسیم یا نترسیم چه اثری روی میزان رنجی که باید تحمل کنیم گذاشتهایم؟
سناریوی اول نوشته را که یادتان هست؟ مرگ رویمان اسلحه کشیده است. چه التماس بکنیم چه نکنیم او کار خود را میکند چون از جای دیگر دستمزد میگیرد. صحبت بر سر تلخی و سنگینی لحظه جان دادن نیست، بلکه بر سر اشتغالی ذهنیست، شبیهسازی لحظهی مرگ که به ترس از آن منجر میشود و ارتباط علیتی با رویدادهای واقعی جهان خارج ما ندارد. لحظهی مرگ میتواند سنگینترین تجربهی هر انسانی در طول دورهی حیاتش باشد اما ترس ذهنی از آن معنا ندارد چون کوچکترین تأثیری روی زمان وقوع مرگ و میزان درد و رنج ناشی از آن نخواهد داشت.
و بالاخره مورد سوم که نگاهی رو به آینده دارد. ترس از جهان بعد از مرگ. در اینجا نیز با ترسی مواجه هستیم که به جای قوانین علیت از قوانین تعمیم ذهنی پیروی میکند. چیزی که همه آن را میشناسیم. ترس از امور ناشناخته. ترس از باز کردن جعبههای دربسته در کودکی. ترس وارد شدن به اتاقهایی که هیچکس به آنها وارد نمیشود مثل اتاق خاله صبا در هوشمندان سیاره اوراک. بله درست است، هرکسی میترسد از اینکه به جایی برود که قوانینش را نمیشناسد و هیچ چیز از آنجا نمیداند.
اما اینجا هم کل سناریو را ذهنمان میسازد. از کجا معلوم که به بهترین ناحیه از هستی وارد نشویم؟ از کجا معلوم که بعد از مرگ بهترینها در درهی شاپرکها انتظارمان را نکشد؟ و اینکه آیا رفتارمان مثل جنینی نیست که از متولد شدن هراس دارد و گریه میکند؟ لابد رحم را بهترین دنیا و بعد از رحم را بدترین دنیا میداند.
در مورد ترس اول اگر زندگی کنیم و سعی کنیم به معنای زندگی خود پی ببریم، لحظهی مرگ یک هارمونی دلچسب از زیستههایمان خواهد بود، مثل حس شیرین و البته دلتنگکننده صعود هواپیما از وطنی که آن را به کمال زیستهای و حال به دلخواه خودت از آن کوچ میکنی. امیدوارم هیچکس در انتها از زندگی خود ناامید یا پشیمان نباشد.
اما ترسهای حال و آینده، هر دو شبیهسازیهایی تخیلی از مرگ واقعیاند که هیچ گاه برایمان رخ ندادهاند تا میزانی برای مقایسه داشته باشیم. ما نمیدانیم لحظهی مردن واقعا تلخ است یا شیرین چون تا به حال حتی یک بار هم نمردهایم. ما نمیدانیم جهان ناشناختهی بعد از مرگ چه چیزهای عذابآور یا لذتبخشی برایمان خواهد داشت چون هیچوقت به آنجا سفر نکردهایم. اما بهتر است همهی اینها را بگذاریم برای موعد خودشان. ترسیدن الانمان فقط و فقط در مغز خودمان رخ میدهد و زندگیمان را تبدیل به کابوسی میکند. همان زندگیای که موقع مردن که برسد برای تجربهی لحظه لحظهاش حاضریم هر کاری بکنیم.
سرنوشت هم ثابت کرده است که خیلی از لو دادنِ مطالب خوشش نمیآید و همیشه دوست دارد برای سورپرایز کردنِ ما هم که شده هدایایش را از آستین در بیاورد.
یک داستان جالب با یک پایان رویایی و باز برای تسکین یک بیمار رو به مرگ از کابوسهای مختل کننده زندگی
بیش از تفلسف محصول تخیل بود. ظاهرا انسان کنونی با فرآیند تخیل بسیار آشناتر از قبل شدهاست.
ترس از مرگ چیزی ورای آن سه گانه مقدس است است که معلوم نیست چطور وارد داستان شد و به راحتی همه چیز را تحلیل کرد.
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